(May 27) Don't get excited. Actually, get the opposite of excited because we are a long way off. Not that Motoaki and I don't want to have kids- we just kind of want (need) money, time, etc. So anyway the title is about the fact that I had the "baby talk" yesterday with a group of 2nd graders (about 7 years old) at lunch. Quite funny actually. I eat lunch with students and everyday changes as far as what age I sit with. Older kids are fun because we can discuss things like music, movies, etc. On the other hand older kids can be snobby, rude, and generally stand-offish. Fair enough, when I was 13 the last thing I wanted was a teacher sitting at the lunch table asking me if I liked basketball.
The little kids (3rd grade and under) can be difficult because they don't understand conversations even in Japanese, but at the same time they are fun because they are generally excited to see me and will answer enthusiastically about the most mundane of topics (which convenience store do you like is always a hot topic). I will ask them simple questions in English but we also use a lot of Japanese. And it's nice because the little kids will not only correct my grammar, but they won't be snobby about it- just very matter of fact. So it started out talking about brothers and sisters and they asked me if I had any siblings. I told them, yes, that I had an older brother and a younger sister. They asked if we ever fought and I said that we did a lot when we were little and that Maggie and I especially had some blow outs due to being close in age and having to share so much. They asked how old she is and when I told them they were like, "Oh, she is really young. You are really young!" This is probably due to the fact that they think the staff at school are all over 50 and were shocked to here I wasn't over 30. I responded by saying that THEY were really young.
In Japan the kindergarten is housed in a separate building and does everything (lunch, play time, etc) separately, so the 1st grade is really the bottom of the totem pole. These being 2nd graders (and new 2nd graders- the school year started in April) they were quick to point out that they were actually quite old and that the 1st graders were REALLY young- like babies really. I laughed and said that the kindergarteners across the way were younger and one smart girl said that the nursery school (a combination of preschool-daycare) had very young kids (I think you can start there at 6 months). Then the wise boy with the older brothers told me the baby in my stomach was the youngest to which I said there wasn't a baby there. To which they all replied, "But your married!!" And then a kid started on a story about how the babies were waiting to come out. Knowing this was getting out of hand I quickly exclaimed, "I think it's going to rain!" causing all of the little eyes to dart to the window and thus beginning a discussion about how it wasn't raining but it might rain and how so-and-so didn't have an umbrella and how one time so-and-so went to the mall and bought rain boots that are pink and how so-and-so thinks purple is better than pink but that light green is the best... LOL- love how easy it is to change directions.
Now these were kids and so it didn't bother me at all for them to make the assumption that just because I am married I will have a baby any day now. But it does bug me when adults assume this and it is awkward when the teens bring it up. Like the time the kindergarten teacher patted my baggy sweater and asked "Baby??" or the time the 8th graders spent their lunch time saying over and over how cute my babies with Motoaki would be (it's a small town so a lot of the kids have seen Motoaki and I together at the supermarket and know what's what).
In America I get it a bit but not as much as Japan, where things are still a little behind when it comes to equality in the sexes. The same thing happens with people asking me if I need to go home early to prepare dinner for my husband or if I mind washing his clothing. At the same time, as behind as they are in gender equality, they are much more open about sex and bodies. In the elementary schools there are posters describing how food turns to poop (including a complete illustration of a cartoon but) and kids are allowed to say boobs, penis, etc as much as they want. Sometimes I feel like a prude (when it comes to talking about bodies) and sometimes I feel like a flag of freedom (when talking about the fact my husband is a way better cook than I am or ever wish to be).
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